I’m going into London tomorrow to meet a friend from the internet. We’ve been talking most days since last December and get on very well and she has SA too so it shouldn’t be too nerve wracking in theory, but I’m still getting quite anxious about it. The thing that keeps running through my head is that I’ll be so boring to spend time with and she’ll be wishing for the time to go quickly so she can escape 😦 I’ve told her that I’m worried about being boring and she reassured me that I won’t be, and that she feels the same way. I find that hard to take on board though, maybe it’s because of my low self esteem. Whenever I’m in any social situation, I always feel responsible for any lulls in the conversation or awkward moments, even though logically I know that it may not always be my fault, I simply cannot believe it in my heart of hearts.
Despite all this, I’m determined to go anyway (I’ve booked my tickets and everything now). Meeting up with my friend is something I’ve wanted to do for a long time, I didn’t think I’d have the opportunity so I really want to take advantage of it. We’re going to watch The Dark Knight in Leicester Square which should be fun, and at least will give us another topic of conversation.